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I help good-hearted people build strong inner validation.
Not cocky confidence.
Not emotional disconnect.
Not "I don't need nobody".
But the freedom to enjoy life and pursue what you most want -- without being so affected by others.
(Yes, including that one person).
I don't help you to stop caring.
I help you to stop relying.
Hi! I'm Tracy.
I've spent most of my life trying to care less about what others think.
I created an "I don't care!" cool persona, and took pride not following the crowd.
But underneath it all, I still cared. A LOT.
And I relied on boyfriends, alcohol, and people-pleasing to make me feel better.
But when it wasn't working, I'd fall apart.
In trying not to care, I became emotionally out-of-control.
I realized that caring wasn't the real problem.
The real problem was that I didn't know who I'd be if I wasn't relying on external validation.
My self-identity was built around earning love and approval.
I didn't know how to stop relying on it, because it's all I'd known.
The reason why other people's opinions affected me so much was because I was reliant on them for my identity.
Once I learned how to build an identity around my own love and approval, it no longer mattered so much what others thought about me.
I still cared.
But it no longer ruled my life and caused me so much emotional turmoil.
Finally I was able to experience inner confidence, peace, and joy. Finally I was free.
You're NOT going to hear me say:
“Just tell yourself that you’re a badass!”
“Just focus on the things you do like about yourself!”
“Just stand up straighter — you’ll feel confident!”
These can be helpful reminders for folks who have a healthy self-identity.
But if they feel like putting a cute dismissive band-aid on a gaping wound... you're in a the right place.
I help you heal the wound at the source -- at your identity.
Being internally validated doesn't come from more time alone, more hobbies, or positive affirmations.
It's an identity you create.
It's a deep self-knowing that roots you into your unshakable truth.
And once you have it, it's yours for life.
